Talking about the lyrics I wrote

looking for the message you’ve sent me or the pictures of better times guessing all the things that i’d say back for this unrequited love

Suggested in the next half of the verse, that I try rhyming the last line. Have steps of removal from the actual event; don’t be like The Christmas Shoes.

Suggestions:

• “or the pictures of better times” → “or the pictures i thought i took”
• allowing yourself one or two lines to be literal about what you’re singing about is fine. moments of grounding are fine as long as we don’t stay there.
• Consider exploring other words to let listeners get more different meanings out of the song; “unrequited love” is specific, which can be good if I want the listeners to get a specific meaning.

Homework:

• Do another four lines
• Think about the moments that made my unrequited loves special
• Find out if I can have a lesson Christmas week